LMAO

I found some old blogs of mine tonight, in which was this gem written in 2004...

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"Nice Guys Always Finish Last"

What the hell is that all about anyways??
Of course the nice guys always finish last you dumb asses.. Once we find a nice guy, we're done. F*ing A!!!

Guys can be such selfcentered idiots sometimes.. But that stupid ass quote... I'm just sick of hearing it. A nice guy doesn't 'finish last'... He just finishes, geeze...

Don't guys understand that the "Nice guys finish last" attitude is so freaking unattractive...
It's as ugly and unattractive as whining.... Lots of guys sit around, "Why does that asshole get so many girls, and I can't get a single one?!"
Well, firstly... he's an asshole, and most of those girls are whores... Is that really something to be jealous of?!

Noooooooooo........ >,<

Secondly, maybe if you'd open your eyes and shut your bitching mouth, you'd notice that there are girls for you. Better ones.

Hopes & Prayers for Tomorrow

Dear Friends,

I know that I have done a very lousy job lately of keeping you up to date, I plan to see that this is fixed beginning tomorrow when I enter a new chapter in what has already been an eventful year. Thank you for your caring words, thoughts and prayers , they have kept me warm & comforted.

Tomorrow morning I have what, I hope, will turn out to be a very big doctor's appt. that will start a dramatic change for the better. Sunday I discovered that these "naps" and long moments where I "just needed to close my eyes" were actually episodes of blacking out due to intense waves of pain. I was found on the floor of my shower, where I had been unconscious for at least 30-45 minutes. This has rattled me as much as the person who found me, as I had not been aware that I had actually been losing consciousness. Hopefully the doctor I am seeing in the morning will feel the same way.

You will recieve a longer, more informed, update tomorrow with everything I have failed to keep you updated with so far as well as what is to come. Thank you all again for being so wonderful to me.

What Dreams May Come

To put into words all of the ways this movie touches my soul seems like an impossible feat; thus far it has been.

This is what I envision heaven to be, and how I have perceived my life in many ways.

In the times that I need to cry, for both the good and the bad reasons (though usually the latter), this is where I turn. Sweeping me and my emotions along with it from the very first scene, as I know well what is to come, I cry straight through to the end. This feeling for me is as though it where an affirmation of my own life and all that I face in it.

If you have not seen this movie, or perhaps never truly gave it a chance because you "didn't get it" or where "just not into it", please do. As much as I hope others find this movie speaking to their hearts as it does my own, I hope that those who might desire to be near me can see what I see in it so that perhaps they can see more truly.. me and how I perceive me.

Perhaps some day I can be "so wonderful that a man would chose to spend eternity in hell over heaven" to be with me.

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Just some more meaningful quotes...

What's true in our minds is true, whether some people know it or not.

What some folks call impossible, is just stuff they haven't seen before.

That's when I realized I'm part of the problem. Not because I remind you. But because I couldn't join you.

Thank you for every kindness. Thank you for our children. For the first time I saw them. Thank you for being someone I was always proud to be with. For your guts, for your sweetness. For how you always looked, for how I always wanted to touch you. God, you were my life. I apologize for every time I ever failed you. Especially this one...

Sometimes, when you win, you lose.
&
Sometimes, when you lose, you win.

Chris: Where is God in all of this?
Albert: Oh, He's up there. Somewhere... shouting down that He loves us. Wondering why we can't hear Him. You think?